Brett Favre Returns To Green Bay

Bret Favre Statue Built In Green Bay

In anticipation of the Packers-Vikings game in Green Bay on October 24th, the mayor of Green Bay, Mayor McCheese, has asked Packers fans to welcome back Brett Favre but to keep the welcomes “tasteful.”



“So a statue of Brett wiping his behind with a slice of funky French fromage is out of the question?” asks petulant Packers fan Jack Pepper.



“What if we draw up a banner showing Brett sandwiched between two waffle slices?” asks pretty perky Packers fan Pamela Muenster.



“I’ve got it! We’ll have a dummy wearing No. 4 mashed under a big pile of cheeseheads!” offers pesty Packers fan Colby Asiago.



“What if we make fun of Brett’s commercial where he can’t decide which TV to buy by showing the TVs have sprouted legs and are walking off in disgust?” asks particularly prickly Packers fan Jack Monterey.



"What if we showed Brett trying to make phone calls, but instead of getting reception, all his phone calls are intercepted...or maybe showing him making phone calls without his pants?” proposes pompous Packers fan Paneer Provolone.



“How in the heck are you going to depict phone calls as being intercepted?” asks perplexed Packers fan Feta Monchego. "I can see depicting him holding the phone in the crotchital area—but being intercepted?"





Adam Bettcher/Getty Images “I’m not exactly sure,” Provolone posits,“but we could hire the artist, Mike Krawczyk. He can draw anything.”



“I’m not sure we can afford Krawczyk,” says prudent Packers fan Brie Camambert, “and even then, I hear he might be a Steelers fan.”



“OK, how’s this?” replies the priggish Provolone, “We show Favre sitting at a big table in a Waffle House, since he’s such a waffler, and someone at the far end of the table asks him to pass the syrup. Then, when Favre passes the syrup, instead of the guy at the far end of the table who originally asked for the syrup getting the bottle, another guy in a Packers shirt intercepts it.”



“That would be a very complicated mural,” ponders periodontally prominent Packers fan Parmesan Ricotta. “I’m not sure that even an artist like Krawczyk could complete such a project in this short period of time.”



“Okay, how’s this?” the preening yet pragmatic Provolone poses. “We erect a statue of Brett facing a group of Packers fans who all have knives in their backs...with Jenn Sterger carrying the biggest knife.”



“Guys!” yells Mayor McCheese while wearing a cheese coat and a cheesehead hat with string cheese hanging from his nose. “Keep it tasteful!”